When coping with a drug addiction or substance abuse problem of a loved one it is necessary to engage with that person and attack the problem. This is especially difficult for spouses of addicts. They endure the most pain and suffering during an addiction. The process of watching the person you choose to spend the rest of your life with destroying their minds, bodies, and futures is depressing, to say the least. It can even be debilitating. This process can be especially difficult as the process of addiction has happened over time while being witness to it. This helps an addict create a sense that there is nothing wrong or that you were on board with their decisions. At the same time, these relationships are built on trust and even ground. Partners in life, one is not in control of the other. This situation makes confronting the problem difficult, but not impossible. Partners of addicts should not be hesitant for afraid to confront the situation. After all, the long it continues the worse it will get. There are several different models of intervention that spouses can choose from, love first intervention or addiction intervention can be helpful. Review the available methods of delivering interventions to find the one that best suits your situation.
Addiction is different from person to person, while many of the characteristics are the same, each case is different. As such, it is important to analyze the partnership, life, and addiction at hand. The more a spouse knows or understands about addiction, intervention, and treatment, the better equipped to handle it. Studies have shown that families that host interventions are much more likely to convince their loved ones that they need help.
When planning an intervention, it is important to get a few things right. The first obstacle is creating the perfect team. Interventions must consist of several people who are close with the addict. The addict must feel safe in the situation, therefore strangers (outside of a specialist) or acquaintances should not be involved. Close family and friends are the only people that can have a positive impact on the intervention. Professional interventionalists are a great resource that should be utilized to maintain focus and decorum in an intervention. The more prepared the team is the better. It is essential that the team practice their talking points to ensure they are focused and on task. A ‘script’ is difficult to follow but will help all those involved to stay on task and reduce the chance of emotions taking over the conversation. This intervention is a time to show the addict that you care and only want the best for them. Compassion and love are the best tools for getting a loved one to get treatment. All anger and judgment should be dismissed and avoided to keep the discussion constructive.
Love First Intervention
The love first intervention is a very relaxed and loving style of intervention. It is a very popular method for family and spouses of addicts. In a neutral setting, family and loved ones share their love, support, and compassion for the addict. They refute any of the excuses the addict may have for their addict and/or need for treatment. Such facts such as the danger of children growing up in an addictive home or children living with grandparents as the parents attend treatment to help the addict accept treatment. It is essential to remove and avoid all hostility, anger or resentment towards the addict. The final characteristic of a Love First intervention is the preparation and reading aloud of a loving letter. This should include loving memories of the times spent with the addict before their addiction. Finally, loved ones will also share the consequences of them not accepting treatment. Love first intervention is a careful balance of stern warnings and compassionate love and care.